Dating A Gamer | DOs, DON’Ts & Everything You Need To Know

Dating a gamer has its own set of rules. There are many golden nuggets we have, but we’ll start with the most important one.

Before dating a gamer, know that they take their gaming habits very seriously. They don’t perceive games the way the outside world does. Gamers are extremely passionate and devote a lot of time and effort to master a game they love.

To be a better gamer and command respect from your peers is no joke.

Before We Begin

You and I are no different than a gamer. Yes, you read that right. We all have certain things that we enjoy doing the most and are sometimes crazy about.

For gamers, it is gaming. We have written this article to break a lot of myths about dating a gamer. Gaming is not a waste of time. It is an art, and it is a science.

This article will serve as your complete hands-on guide about dating a gamer.

We will give you a lot of valuable information and actionable steps that you can apply right from this moment. So, let us dive right into it!

Tips For Dating A Gamer

1. Show Interest In Their Passion

The best way to connect with gamers is to try and understand why they are so passionate about games? And then talk about their favorite games.

Chat up any gamer, and they will be more than happy to tell you what attracts them and why are they crazy about gaming.

Plus it will earn you brownie points when your partner sees that you are taking an interest in gaming. Also, it might be possible that you start enjoying gaming too.

Show Interest In Their Passion

2. Play With Them

It is the dream of many gamers to date someone who can play with them and be good at it too. Most people are resentful towards gaming and find it to be a stupid thing.

TABLE: Gamers When Asked Should Their Date Also Be A Gamer?

Not necessary, but it’s nice59%
I don’t care3%
Not required but they should accept my gaming lifestyle30%
Yes, I only date gamers8%
Source: A study conducted by where 97 gamers were interviewed.

If you take out the time to sit down with your partner to play, they will appreciate it and in fact, might start taking an interest in your hobbies and passions.

3. Keep The Food Ready

Gamers often find themselves in a position where they have been playing for hours and start feeling hungry.

But the kind of moment they are in the game, it might not allow them to pause it and arrange for food.

Many times gamers stay hungry for long hours or skip meals altogether.

Thus your gamer boyfriend or girlfriend would be profoundly grateful to you if food is ready for them when they want it.

Try and make it nutritious too instead of just serving them unhealthy snacks.

4. Give Them Their Freedom

Gamers are extremely passionate about their games and equipment.

Therefore they need their own space without anybody disturbing them constantly or nagging them about not getting up for hours.

So, it would be best if you gave them all the freedom they want so that they can enjoy their games without having to worry about anything else.

5. Go On Gaming Related Dates, Arcades

Want to impress your gaming boyfriend or girlfriend? Take them somewhere where gaming is the theme or take them to a place full of games.

This is quite unconventional, and your partner would not be expecting it at all.

They would be surprised and appreciate you for making an effort to arrange for such an outing.

go on gaming related dates, arcades

Things That Gamers Hate

1. Don’t Say Anything When They Are Playing

One thing that gamers hate is to be disturbed while they are enjoying their ‘Me Time’ with their favorite game.

Talking to a gamer while they are completely immersed in their game is a big sin. Most of the time, they wouldn’t be even paying attention to what you are saying.

If you bring up the content of the conversation later, they are most likely to deny that you said anything like that and they won’t be lying.

2. Don’t Beat A Gamer In Their Favorite Game

Every gamer has that one game which is their favorite, and they are crazy about it. Never beat a gamer in their favorite game.

They are really proud of the fact that they are good at it. You will be bruising their ego big time by doing so, and they may end up sulking for days to come.

However, this is also an opportunity for you to crush them and then rub it in their face later on.

3. Don’t Try To Help Them

Gamers take pride in the fact that they are extremely good at gaming. It may seem logical to help them in a game.

But the message they will receive is that they are not capable of even doing that one thing properly about which they have been bragging to the world throughout their life.

So, let them figure out their own path.

4. Don’t Disturb Them During The Cutscene

Cutscenes during a game are not an invitation to talk. Period.

What most non-gamers don’t understand is that cutscenes are an essential part of the game story (yes, games have a storyline too).

Therefore, by disturbing them, you are depriving them of the complete experience. Do not make that rookie mistake.

5. Don’t Be Careless Around Their Equipment

If you do not want to incur the wrath of a gamer upon yourself, then handle their equipment like you would handle a months-old baby.

Gamers are very attached to their equipment and if by any chance you cause any harm, be prepared to see what the devil in hell looks like.

Understand that they invest a lot of money and time choosing the right equipment, so it is understandable what they must feel.

Things To Know While Dealing With A Gamer

1. “Just 5 More Minutes” Does Not Mean 5 Minutes

Gamers just say that to make you go away and let them continue peacefully. Five minutes is the first thing that comes out of their mouth.

When someone is going to a date or a wedding and say “just five more minutes and I’ll be out” while getting ready, do you believe them? Of course not.

And if you do, you end up waiting and waiting and waiting. So why don’t you check back in another hour or instead to do whatever it is yourself?

2. Gamers Wear Related Merchandize

If you are a fashionista, then you might not somewhat agree with a gamer’s choice of clothing.

But the kind of clothes they wear defines who they are and are often related to popular games. It might also be something about gaming that really connects with them.

So if you find your gamer partner wearing something odd, then don’t make a face. Ask them nicely, and they will be kind enough to explain.

3. End Of Chat At Night Doesn’t Mean The End Of The Night

If you find your partner awake even after saying good night, then no, they are not cheating on you.

A gamer will quietly cut themselves off from the outside world after a day’s work and retire to what they love doing the most, i.e., play their favorite game.

So, please don’t get mad at them because when he or she said goodnight, it did not mean that they were going to sleep.

4. They Are Passionate About It As An Artist Is About Art

For a hardcore gamer, gaming is an art form in itself. They are extremely dedicated and sincerely passionate about it.

A gamer practices almost every day and is really serious about what he or she considers to be a training session.

Therefore if you cannot appreciate it, never demean gaming in front of a gamer unless you want to be ripped apart like they annihilate their enemies in games.

5. They Hate It When You Mess With Their Stuff

That game they bought last year is supposed to be in the narrow cupboard, and they should be able to find it as and when needed.

The same goes for their controllers and other equipment. Gamers hate it when they see that their stuff has been touched without their permission.

It drives them crazy if they do not find anything gaming related precisely where it was supposed to be.

6. They Suddenly Become Extremely Excited

Sudden cursing, swearing, screams, unbearable squeals, kicking the furniture, and breaking the controller are some of the typical behaviors that you may find in a hardcore gamer.

It does not mean that they are violent and aggressive. It is just an extremely passionate way of expressing their emotions while gaming.

If you see something of that sort happening, do not freak out. They are going to stop after some time. 

7. Gaming Is Not Just For Kids

Okay, if you are from the school of thought that thinks that only kids play games, then you cannot be more wrong.

Gaming is tough, no questions about that. It requires a lot of concentration, effort, and dedication if you want to be good.

If your partner is good at gaming, then this is because they have been putting in years of effort. Respect their present as they have hustled a lot in their past.

8. Don’t Judge Them For Their Choice

The last thing that you would want is to make fun of a gamer in terms of their life choices.

Being a gamer is already looked down upon by a lot of people as wastage of time and money.

They do not consider it as a possible career path, and society does a great job of judging them. The last thing a gamer would want is their partner considering them useless.

don't judge them for their choice

How Do You Have A Relationship With Gamers?

To have a relationship with a gamer, educate yourself about their favorite games. You can also practice playing these games secretly and surprise them someday. A true gamer would love you for your efforts and trying something they like.

1. Talk In A Way They Understand

They usually do not listen to you when engrossed in games and often forget to do the chores? Well, no worries. Try and get creative with your lingo.

Pick up some keywords from their favorite games and find their meaning. Then simply drop them into conversations.

Like if you run out of food, tell them that you’ve run out of ‘ammo’ or ‘supplies.’ Your boyfriend or girlfriend is sure to notice that.

2. Be Creative In Finding Romantic Moments

In many ways, dating a gamer is just like dating another person with a different hobby or passion.

If you find your partner too occupied with their gaming habits, then maybe it is time for you to take up the romantic initiative.

Try and find creative ways to make up a romantic atmosphere in the house. It doesn’t always need to be conventional, like flowers and candles around.

Something like a game themed room decoration would be a pleasant and exciting touch.

3. Communicate The Important During A Game

Do not take this one literally, but it can be a nice change.

If you have something important to say, and your gamer boyfriend or girlfriend has been too busy to pay attention, then get on the console.

Load a 2-player game, wear the headset and throw in whatever you have to say during the game.

However, remember this is for fun only and should not be the only way of communication.

4. Find A ‘No Distractions’ Time

Dating a gamer can often be frustrating as they tend to use most of their free time for gaming.

Therefore, both of you should have a pre-decided time that you should be spending exclusively with each other without any distractions.

It can be a specific time like 1-hour a day from say, 11 pm to 12 am every day or every other day. Whatever suits your schedule, it needs to be consistent and regular.

5. Don’t Force Them To Choose

Never get frustrated and ask a gamer to choose either between their games or you. It would be putting them in a precarious position.

They would hate you for suggesting something like this. Moreover, it will hurt you a lot if your gaming boyfriend or girlfriend dumps you and chooses games instead.

Thus, finding ways to improve your relationship is a better option.

don't force them to choose

6. They Want Someone Who Understands Their Passion

Most gamers are perceived as geeks, nerds, and whatnot, even though there is nothing wrong with being one. Also, it might be untrue, as this is just an external perception.

Thus, a lot of them never try to date anyone as they are skeptical of how the outside world treats them.

Still, every gamer seeks a partner who can understand them well enough and adjust to their gaming habits.

7. For Some Gaming Is Their Livelihood

Not every gamer plays for fun or relaxing. Some earn money to survive from the same, and thus it is equally respectable like any other profession.

Still, a lot of people see gaming as a waste of time and look down upon it.

Therefore, it is incredibly unnerving for gamers to have a partner around who is full of nothing but criticism about them.

8. Show Them How They Can Earn From It

Even if your gamer boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t earn through gaming, you can always try to find out ways how they can do it.

A quick Google search would reveal hundreds of ways through which making money while playing games is possible.

We are sure your partner would appreciate you for taking the time out to find something like this for them.

9. Find Inexpensive Alternatives For Gaming Equipment

Gamers tend to spend a lot of money on their gaming equipment and related stuff.

Thus, it would be a financial boon for them to have someone like you who can find some equally good but cheaper alternative for the tech stuff.

But, it would demand a lot of research and hard work on your part.

You would need to be thorough with the latest gaming technologies and take an active interest in your partner’s equipment.

10. Celebrate Their Wins, Console Them When They Lose

One of the best things you can do for a gamer is to be equally excited about their wins and celebrate them.

Similarly, being a sweet friend who mourns their losses and consoles them will also earn you a lot of points.

A gamer will love it if he or she sees that they have someone who loves them and understands their emotional ups and downs.

celebrate their wins, console them when they lose

PROs & CONs Of Dating A Gamer

Advantages Of Dating A Gamer

1. Since gamers tend to spend most of the time indoors and devote whatever free time they have into gaming, their chances of cheating are way less.

2. Dating a gamer would mean that you would always have a lot of unusual topics to talk about due to different interests. And in case you love gaming too, even more things to talk about!

3. Gamers are smart an intelligent species. Due to years of gaming experience, they have out of the ordinary decision-making abilities, broad imagination, creative thought process, and superb reflexes.

4. Due to being into gaming, gamers tend to know a lot about the latest technologies and related trends. Their knowledge can be handy when you need to buy a gadget.

5. Due to repeated failures in a lot of missions over the years, gamers know that all it takes is another try. Gamers tend to be patient with their partner in the event of any ups and downs. In simple words, they keep trying.

6. Gamers thoroughly understand the concept of giving their partner ‘space.’ Since they need a lot of space too when they are in their ‘zone’ of gaming, they tend to be generous givers, and you’ll never feel suffocated with them.

7. Gamers can keep themselves entertained without needing you at all. They don’t get bored quickly, and in case they do, all they need is to go back to their console.

8. Gamers tend to maintain friendships for years, even with strangers and sacrifice their sleep just to play a few extra rounds with them. They have big hearts. Imagine what they would do for you.

Disadvantages Of Dating A Gamer

1. A gamer tends to spend most of their free time on gaming. Thus, you may sometimes find it challenging to seek their presence and help in essential situations.

2. A lot of gamers have a very sedentary and unhealthy lifestyle due to long hours of incorrect posture while gaming and horrible eating habits.

3. Be prepared for the fact that a lot of money will be spent on gaming equipment and anything related to gaming from time to time.

4. “Just 5 minutes more” & “I need to finish this first” are some of the phrases that you need to get used to. Also, be prepared about the delay in chores with a deadline.

5. Sometimes gamers can be casual about important things as gaming makes them used to extra lives. They tend to think that one can always try again later on.

6. A gamer’s social circle will not be a very diverse one and consist mostly of gamers. Thus you might feel trapped in such a group of friends.

7. You might feel abandoned and neglected at some point in time while dating a gamer. As their life revolves heavily around gaming, you might feel unimportant even though it won’t necessarily be true.

8. Gamers are heavily influenced by the kind of game they play regularly or at that moment. Thus if your partner is spending time with a very dark or violent game, be prepared for the psychological effects.

pros and cons of dating a gamer

What Dating A Gamer Is Like?

Dating a gamer is a very enriching experience if you are not negative about gaming. You’ll learn a ton about gaming and technology. You might also discover some problem-solving strategies that can be applied to real-life situations. Plus, gaming improves your reflexes.

1. Communicative And Easy To Talk To

Gamers are not very difficult to talk to. You can always chat one up with minimal efforts.

All you need to do is have some kind of query or opinion about a popular game or gaming in general, and you will realize they can chat about it for hours at a stretch.

2. Aren’t Materialistic About Superficial Things

Gamers aren’t usually into superficial stuff that a lot of people dig.

Since gamers treat their passion as an art, therefore, they renounce tacky things like an overly flashy lifestyle and running after money or external beauty.

3. They Have A Purpose In Life

Gamers are incredibly passionate about what they do. This separates them from 95% of people who live a life without striving hard with a goal in mind and just flow along.

Even if it is as simple as becoming a better gamer, they still have a purpose.

4. Care About Minute Things

Since a gamer will be very particular about even the minutest dust particle on his or her gaming console or PC, therefore, this habit carries through in other aspects of household care too.

Not every gamer’s room is full of trash, and soda cans lying around as media portrays it.

5. They Only Take Revenge In A Game

Gamers are too occupied in their own life and thus won’t try to harm you even if you wrong them unknowingly.

However, they will love to put you in your place if given a chance using gaming as a mode of revenge.

6. They Don’t Expect Extraordinary Gifts

This point follows what we said about gamers not being materialistic. You don’t need to give them costly gifts to impress them while taking them out on a date or later on.

Anything simple related to the world of gaming will work wonders.

7. They Don’t Give Up Easily

Years of gaming immunes them to failures, and they just don’t quit. They are stubborn but in the right way.

Whatever difficulties life throws at them, they have an attitude of fighting it back and coming out as a winner at the end. They won’t give up until they win.

8. Can Improve Their Mood Themselves

If you ever find a gamer sulking, then don’t worry, it won’t last long.

Whenever a gamer is in a bad mood, they know how to set themselves right, and most of the time won’t require any effort from your end.

And when you want to help, just play their favorite game with them.

9. They Are Experts At Snacks

Gamers become experts at snacking due to their gaming habits and routine.

Some gamers have cupboards full of healthy snacks that you can munch away in case you don’t feel like cooking or when you feel hungry at odd hours.

they are experts at snack

Struggles Of Dating A Gamer

1. Your Friends And Family May Not Approve

One of the biggest problems faced by people dating a gamer is that their friends and family do not approve of the relationship.

Gaming and gamers have don’t have a great image outside their circles as most people consider them to be non-serious about their lives and people who waste time.

2. You Need To Make Heavy Adjustments

Dating a gamer requires you to make substantial adjustments to your own life according to their routines and habits.

You will have to make massive efforts just to find a few moments of peaceful time together. Also, you need to care about their health too as they tend to skip meals while playing.

3. You Might Pick Up Some Of The Bad Habits

It is easy to be influenced by the kind of person you are dating, and the sedentary and unhealthy lifestyle of a gamer might rub off on you.

Therefore, you need to keep in check not only your health and habits but also those of your partner.

Doing so is crucial to maintain the longevity of the relationship and be happy with each other.

4. It Gets Even Worse If They Are On Twitch

Twitch is the world’s leading live streaming platform for gamers where they record themselves live while gaming.

If gamers tend to spend a lot of time on gaming, then imagine a gamer on Twitch. This means that your gamer boyfriend or girlfriend will have even less time to spend with you.

Twitch will be your enemy.

5. Ego Bruising Due To Losing To Other Genders

There will be times when you would be playing a game or two together. Gradually, as you become better at playing games, you might beat them once or twice.

This might heavily bruise their ego due to not only losing to a non-gamer but also a person of a different gender in case you are a straight couple.

6. Physical Intimacy Might Not Be Great Due To Unhealthy Lifestyle

If your gaming boyfriend or girlfriend has a bad lifestyle and routine, then this will inevitably affect your private life too.

Great lovemaking requires you to be physically fit up to a certain level, and being fit requires effort, which a lot of gamers don’t devote time to.

Most of them want to be better only at gaming.

7. Important Tasks Will Be Procrastinated

Write this is golden letters. “Important work will always be put off and get delayed in exchange for a few more rounds of gaming.”

Thus if you need to get critical work done well in time, start bugging them weeks before the deadline period.

And you need to remind them regularly every day even if they get fed up with it.

8. They Are Mostly Insular

The dictionary definition of being insular is to be ignorant of or uninterested in cultures, ideas, or people outside one’s own experience.

While exceptions do exist, a lot of gamers are only interested in their world of gaming and related activities.

Thus as a partner, it can be frustrating for you to see your gamer boyfriend or girlfriend not taking an interest in whatever you find interesting or are passionate about.

9. Addiction Is Highly Probable

A lot of gamers experience symptoms similar to any form of addiction and sometimes cannot live without gaming.

There have been cases of deaths due to long playing hours and inviting mental illnesses due to losing track of reality.

Also, gaming becomes a medium of escape for a lot of gamers from the real problems and challenges of life.

addiction is highly probable


Gamers have often been misunderstood time and again, and the way our films and T.V. have portrayed them has only deteriorated their image.

Gamers are perfectly normal people with different interest areas. The digital world excites them, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Now share with us how will you prove to be the best date a gamer has ever had? Will you play with them regularly or will you make them healthy snacks? Comment below!

Shashank Verma

A trained theatre actor and a STEM graduate who brings perspectives and methods from these worlds into dating and relationships. Also a big time Krav Maga enthusiast and practitioner.

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