How To Make Him Feel Guilty Through Text? | Texts That Work

So you want your boyfriend or husband to feel guilty? Or is it your date? By playing games to make him feel guilty via text, you’ll make him think about you, but only for a short time.

Make him feel guilty through text, or in general, by exhibiting attractive traits. Don’t actively try to make him feel guilty. It is childish. Just like nobody wants a man child, an emotionally immature woman is unattractive. Petty revenge gives you a short pleasure boost but leads nowhere.

Will it make him realize what he would be losing if you aren’t there? Will it guarantee that he never hurts you again? No!

Pro-tip: If you work on being an attractive woman, it will yield better results. You don’t need childish games, but rather, a mature strategy to be an attractive woman that men find irresistible.

How can you be a woman that your man will find irresistible? Read His Secret Obsession to know how.

Before We Begin

Maybe he cheated on you, hurt you emotionally or physically, or decided to dump you altogether.

And for some reason, you want to let them know about what a horrible man he is through text.

This article will help you deal with whatever the situation is and also provide sample texts to send to him. But first things first, you need to get your mindset right.

Thus, first we would be discussing in detail the mindset you need to be in right now before you send him even a single text.

A couple of hours or days at most is what he’ll feel guilty when these texts aren’t backed up with the right attitude.

With the wrong mindset, these texts will not only never yield positive results but also backfire.

The Correct Mindset

People are interested in the idea of guilt. Here is a crazy fact for you. Guilt is not a strong enough emotion to make someone realize their mistake.

We know you want to tell him:

  • “How could you hurt me?”
  • “Why are you with someone new?”
  • “How could you leave me? We have a family, and we have a life together!”
Sad woman crying with tears rolling down her cheek

How could you do this? How could you do that, etc., are things that you might want to scream in his face.

You are trying to invoke a sense of guilt in him, but the real trick here is to follow the right emotion. And the right emotion is attraction. Forget trying to make him feel guilty.

If anything he is probably going to start feeling sorry for you and that’s just not attractive. Attraction is the tool that we are after here.

If the guy sees you as attractive, he’ll be the one one in love while you may or may not be. Want to know how to reach that point in your present and future relationships? We want to turn the tables, right?

Read my in-depth article on what to do if you love him but he doesn’t love you.

So, instead of trying to make him feel guilty, focus on trying to make him view you as attractive.

If you can achieve this, then you won’t need to make him feel guilty at all about what he has done.

He will realize it on his own because he’ll think you’re hot, cool, attractive, and will reconsider his actions.

We know it sounds counterintuitive but believe it or not, this is the key to making him realize his mistake.

The Strategy

When it comes to being attractive, you have to consider all the things that make someone attractive.

Self-confidence, self-assurance, being self-aware, being able to engage in new activities, meeting new people, and being a bit more extroverted are some of those.

There are so many definitions and characteristics that can make someone more attractive.

We want you to focus on them rather than trying to send a text message trying to make him feel guilty. We know you want to let him know just how much he has hurt you.

You might think that you don’t want to play games with him. You should be who you are with the person that you love.

You want to tell him what’s on your mind and that’s what will make a difference. Believe it or not, it’s not about the game. We’re not playing games.

We’re not tapping into who he is, we’re tapping into the fact that he is a man. And men operate in very similar ways.

They desire the same things, they fear the same things, and they run from the same stuff. So, think about what’s going to make him chase you and not run away from you.

What Do Men Find Attractive?

Men often pursue similar things, and one of them is attractive women. A woman who is not just physically attractive but also has an engaging personality.

Having hot, supermodel type looks is a plus, but in no way it is the absolute, essential requirement. There are tons of ways to make a man crazy about you.

Know about the male psyche and how to tap into their emotional and biological drives. Men are obsessed about winning.

The guide below talks about how you can use their biological wiring to your advantage. Is there a way to tap into his ego so that he wants to ‘win’ you over and over?

Here you can read our in-depth His Secret Obsession review.

the strategy

Different Situations & Sample Texts

So finally we stumble on to the section that you have been waiting for so eagerly.

Here we would be discussing the various situations because of which you want to make him feel guilty via texts.

Since we do not know what situation you might be in, therefore we have tried to include scenarios that we think are possible.

Also, we have provided a few sample texts for each of these cases. This way, you would always know the exact words to use based on your situation.

Further, you are free to tweak those messages in case you feel the need to. However, always remember the mindset that you need to be in.

You cannot be needy, angry, abusive, portray yourself as the victim or exhibit any negative behavior.

What we are trying to do is be attractive. All these would make you seem anything but attractive in his eyes.

1. If He Has Cheated On You

Before we move on to the sample texts, we need to ask you something. Why on earth do you want to be in touch with a guy who has cheated on you?

Whether through texts, calls, or meetings, or whatever, it is just not worth it.

He doesn’t give a damn about you anyway because had you been that important to him, he wouldn’t have cheated on you.

TABLE: Results Of Staying With A Cheater

Got cheated on again93%
Tried to make it work but couldn’t forget32%
They were unapologetic about it or blamed me28%
Gaslighted my reasonable suspicion or the evidences16%
Not sure whether they are doing it again11%
They changed and mend their ways1%
Source: Study conducted by in which 259 people who were cheated on by their partner were surveyed.
Note: Percentage doesn’t equal to 100 due to overlapping criteria.

Now a lot of you might say, “No, he just made a mistake,” or “It was a one-time thing, I know he loves me.” You know what? Stop right there.

Who are you trying to fool? Us or yourself?

You know it. We know it. So let us stop playing games and address reality. A person can change their habits but not their true nature.

Once a cheater, always a cheater. He will repeat it when the right opportunity shows itself.

Therefore, even though we are providing you with the sample texts, dump him, and move right on. No need to make him realize what a loser he is, he doesn’t deserve your time.

Sample Text 1

No amount of apologies or justification can undo what you have done. So, unless you can invent a time machine, go into the past and rewrite history, I think I am done with you.

Use this one only if you are getting sorry texts from him, else it wouldn’t be as effective.

The message is so powerful as the end strongly suggests that you have made up your mind what to do about him irrespective of what he wants.

And a strong woman who has the guts to call it off is not only intimidating to the guy who is already going through guilt but also commands respect.

Sample Text 2

I hope you at least enjoyed what you did, and it felt worth it. The worst you could do is sabotaging our relationship for something worthless. Let me know if you want the gifts back. You can keep mine as I don’t need them.

P.S.: What should I do with your knife on my back? Do you need it for stabbing someone else?

This message would undoubtedly make him reflect on his actions even if he doesn’t feel guilty about it.

The first two lines compel him to do so while planting a subconscious thought in his mind that what he had with you was great.

Also, talking about the gifts in the manner above hits him with the reality that you are ending things with him in an apathetic way, i.e., feeling nothing for him.

Do this even if you are burning from within. One of the worst feelings in the world is to know that the person whom you were with doesn’t care about you at all.

By cheating on you, he sent that message. By only being bothered about the gifts is your way of letting him know about your priorities.

Sample Text 3

Just a word of advice as someone who loved you once. Never get into the stock market. It is not your strength at all. Plundering long term assets for short term temptations…… Thanks for liberating me from a non-performing asset called our relationship, though. 😉

Dump his ass in the stock market style. The first line of the text hits his subconscious mind and makes him realize that you loved him once but no longer do.

The second part will let him know that he isn’t a wise man at all. If anything, it hurts anyone if they are seen as stupid by their spouse or ex.

And the final sentence tells him that you were not too happy with the relationship either and have finally realized that he wasn’t right for you.

if he has cheated on you

2. If He Has Abused You Verbally Or Physically

Just like the above scenario, you would be much better off if you did not contact him at all.

And if by any chance he has laid a finger on you, we urge you to report it to law enforcement. Nobody should be able to get away with such behaviour.

Today maybe it was just a slap. Tomorrow it might be a punch. Are you going to wait for the day when you would be beaten black and blue?

Some men (and even women) use the justification that, “We raise our hands because we love them deeply. There is too much emotion involved”.

Remember, no amount of love can justify violence in a relationship.

Violence and abuse in any form, physical, verbal, emotional, psychological, whatever the style is, it should not be tolerated.

If he cannot behave like a mature man in case of a disagreement with you, then you have no reason being in such a relationship with that man-child.

Still, here are some sample text messages for you.

Sample Text 1

Your bank account doesn’t seem like it can afford a good lawyer and settlement fees. Please think twice the next time and be grateful that I haven’t pressed charges yet.

This text will make him realize that he has gone too far this time.

It will hit him hard that a woman who loved him once or is still with him does have the courage to make his life a living hell.

So, if there is a next time between you two, he will think twice before opening his mouth.

It gives a clear message that you are not someone that can be taken lightly or who will let him get away with whatever he does.

Sample Text 2

It was so brave of you to act like you did today. I didn’t know you were so capable. I am mesmerized by that hot display. But for some reason, my friends and family don’t agree with me and calling you a psychopath, a sadist, and asking me to report you. They are just jealous of our relationship, I guess.

This one will surely mess up his mind for a few minutes. Because to understand the sarcasm behind it needs time and intelligence.

The very first line where you call him brave, is you calling him out for his cowardly behaviour.

Instead of talking things out like a mature man, he let his emotions get the better of him.

The next part of the text stuns him with the fact that the news of his actions is already out in the open, and he cannot hide now.

Also, by using the words psychopath and sadist indirectly, he gets the message about what he really is.

Finally, the last line plants in his subconscious the thought that had he really been a good guy, you would have stood up for him.

Sample Text 3

Hi honey! I just wanted to thank you for opening my eyes today. You showed me the path to salvation. I had been sinning by thinking about loving you forever, and you enlightened me what a stupid path it was. Thanks again!

P.S.: Jesus might love you, but I sure as hell don’t! I have informed the cops and my lawyer will be over there soon. Thought of returning the favour by showing you your path. I would love to see you again………….in court!

Send the above message only if you have decided to do the right thing, i.e., seek legal help. After all, what guarantee is there that he might not grievously injure you the next time.

While the opening part of the message is both sarcastic and witty, the latter part as P.S. will be causing him some sweat.

Whether it makes him feel guilty or not, it will put him in a submissive position where you will be able to dictate terms to him. He will be reaching out to you.

Make him pay for what he did else he would be doing the same with other people in his life.

if he has abused you verbally or physically

3. If He Has Dumped You

Okay, before you know what kind of text to send to him in this scenario, it is essential to understand what type of text you should never send to him.

Any text message that shows neediness like asking (read begging) him to come back, a message showing that you are just stuck on him by asking him why is he doing this, accusing him, abusing him, threatening him, blackmailing him, etc. are a big no no.

You don’t want him to think that he did the right thing by dumping you. Remember, he has to see us as attractive, and all the above examples would only push him away further.

The golden rule here is to do the counterintuitive in place of what seems logical or right. Ghost him if you can and do not contact him for at least 30 days after he dumps you.

During this timeframe, you might have an extremely strong urge to reach out to him just to ‘see’ how he’s doing. RESIST!

You know you shouldn’t text him but still want to? Read the how to stop texting someone guide.

Take it a notch further by getting the guy completely off your mind….at least for a while. My step by step process on getting someone off your mind will definitely help you!

Then you might send one of these texts. Again do not send repeated texts or call him if he doesn’t reply or has blocked you.

You will only seem needy, and pity or a sorry feeling would be the only things you would be able to get out of him.

You certainly don’t want that. So, here are the texts you might want to send to him.

Sample Text 1

Hi, I was cleaning my room for a house party and came across your gifts. Please let me know if you want them back, or else I will be putting them away in the storeroom. Either, I can send them to you, or you can come over to collect them. Have a good day.

The very first line of the text shows that by planning a house party, you are moving on in your life. We recommend you not to fake it but plan a party with both guy and girlfriends.

Finally, by talking about getting rid of the gifts in a polite way, you are sending a message that you are ready to move on from this chapter of your life.

You may feel that this will push him away, but suddenly he will feel curious as to how can you move on so quickly?

Remember, he expects you to be miserable since he dumped you.

Even if you have been sending needy and begging texts, sending such a text after 15 days does wonders, and it turns the tables.

While it does not guarantee him coming back or even a reply, it does stir his thoughts.

Sample Text 2

Thank you for the wonderful time we spent together and sorry about the times where things were not pleasant between us. This relationship and the mistakes we made will help me learn. Also, it would be beneficial for my future relationships and life in general.

Let us not keep any hard feelings and try to move on from this as mature individuals. I wish you all the best for times ahead. Take care!

This message is again counterintuitive to what you might be trying to achieve, i.e., get back with your boyfriend.

Again, he expects you to beg him to come back and be needy, but instead, you send a text to him that shows you are ready to forget about the past and move on.

Suddenly he feels unwanted, and it does deflate his ego in some way. For the record, let us clarify that we want you to have such a mindset, however difficult it may seem.

Being needy will not get you anywhere, but having the courage to move on might open the gates to communication.

You cannot fake this text message as if you do it with the wrong mindset, he will get to know about it the moment he talks to you and will then despise you even more.

You can also use the same message if you are married and your husband wants to divorce you.

Sample Text 3

I am going out on vacation with some friends. To clarify, I might be seeing other people, and you are free to do the same. In case we do get back together in the future, I don’t want this to be an issue later on. And if we don’t, nothing needs to be done. Have a good day.

There is nothing more thought-provoking than the idea of your ex seeing other people and moving on from you.

Even though he has dumped you, this text might cause some discomfort to him.

If at all he has planned to get back to you or might want to in the future, this text will speed up the process as now he will be living under the fear of you being with someone else.

Again, we recommend you to go out on dates with other people.

Don’t sleep with them early on as rebound relationships are just for physical satisfaction and will leave you feeling guilty.

Also, it might cut off all chances of you getting back with your ex.

If you have doubts about rebound relationships and how to approach them in the best possible way, we have an awesome guide for you to help you comfortably sleep with someone else after a breakup.

In case even after two months, if you and your ex are not back together, then you can allow yourself to get intimately involved with other people.

if he has dumped you

4. If He Has Hurt You Emotionally

This is perhaps the first and the only case in this article where we would not dissuade you from texting him. We leave it to your judgment.

There are so many scenarios that might be possible here as to what might have happened. Maybe, he has lied about something.

Perhaps you came to know he didn’t love you as much as you thought. If that’s the case, then my guide on making him chase you in a relationship would be supremely handy to you!

Coming back to our topic, maybe you realized that he has been using you in some way.

Or you found some secret related to him which he had been hiding all this time. Being his partner, you expected him to tell you about whatever it was.

Also, each person has a different tolerance level. So, even we cannot suggest whether to break all ties with him or not.

Therefore, here are the sample texts you can send to him. It is completely up to you whether to send them or not based on whatever he did is forgivable or not.

Sample Text 1

Known you for quite some time now and however cliched it might sound, it was unexpected from you. Feeling like I don’t even know you anymore.

This text is so powerful because it hits his psyche hard. Humans inherently hate to be called cheaters, and a strange feeling always lingers if you wrong somebody.

This text exactly plays on that feeling. It makes him realize that he has done something wrong with someone who was a trusted ally.

And by writing that you don’t even know him anymore, you send a strong message that the trusted partner is no more by his side. It creates a void which he will feel.

Sample Text 2

And just when I was beginning to think that I am becoming mature and wise when it comes to the judgment of character, you happen. Lol! Thank you for making me realize how naive I am. Well played, didn’t see that coming.

There are so many things going on with this text. The first sentence is a clear question regarding his moral character and conscience.

The second one forces him to think about how he has wronged a person who was thinking that maybe finally they are becoming better with the quality of people in their life.

It signifies that he turned out to be a bad person too. And finally, the last sentence calls him out for playing with your feelings, your emotions, and playing you.

The word ‘player’ already has a negative connotation attached to it, and the vibe perfectly transfers.

Sample Text 3

I am sure you had your reasons for whatever you did. I would have mine for whatever I would do. Forgiving is my nature, but forgetting is not. Let’s just stay away from each other for some time. Need to be around good and honest people.

This message, even though simple, underlines the fact that you have been rubbed wrongly.

While the message may seem threatening but at heart, it conveys that you don’t even want to see his face for some time now.

Also, irrespective of whatever you decide to do about the situation in the future, right now, you need to stay away from dishonest people like him.

Further, the mildly threatening tone of the message would keep him anxious as to what exactly did you mean by that.

Deserves some sleepless nights, doesn’t he? However, we should make it clear that at the core, you should have no ill intentions or schemes to harm him.

Else, it would beat the purpose of this article.

if he has hurt you emotionally

Pro-tip: If you work on being an attractive woman, it will yield better results. You don’t need childish games, but rather, a mature strategy to be an attractive woman that men find irresistible.

How can you be a woman that your man will find irresistible? Read His Secret Obsession to know how.


Channelling your negative energy the right way is the best trick to make him realize his mistakes and feel guilty about it. If your focus lies on him, there would not be any fruitful results.

But if your focus lies on improving yourself, making your life better, and becoming a more attractive version of yourself, then you might achieve what you want.

The results should be a by-product of your efforts on YOURSELF.

Now it is your turn. Which text did you send him and what was his response? Share your experience in the comments below.

Shashank Verma

A trained theatre actor and a STEM graduate who brings perspectives and methods from these worlds into dating and relationships. Also a big time Krav Maga enthusiast and practitioner.

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