When Should The Girl Start Planning Dates? | Making A Move

Being a girl, deciding whether to plan a date or not is undoubtedly tricky. However, if you have feelings towards a guy, taking action and executing a date first is the best idea.

A girl should start planning dates right from the first date itself. It’s an excellent move to initiate meetings with a guy as it shows that the girl is putting in the effort. This also is a good way to break the traditional stereotype that many people have.

Planning dates right from date one is a nice gesture to show towards your partner, and guys may feel negatively if you don’t plan dates.

Why Should The Girl Plan Dates From the First Date itself?

Girls should plan the dates from the first date onwards because it communicates her romantic interest. It is generally considered that only guys make the first move and put in more effort.

By making a move first, you go against the preconception that only guys plan the dates and put in the work in a relationship.

1. Makes The Guy Feel Special

If a girl is making plans to go on a date, it will definitely make the guy feel special and loved.

It shows that she cares about him and wants to build a deeper connection as she has taken the initiative to take the relationship to the next level.

One can surmise that she is pretty serious about the connection they both share and will be loyal to him.

Makes The Guy Feel Special

2. Breaks Stereotypes

As we all know, many people have this prejudiced idea that only guys are willing to make plans and plan various romantic dates & meetups. A girl planning a date first shows her breaking the age-old stereotype.

A girl should think of executing a date first as an expression of being progressive and open, which can make the guy more interested and attracted to them.

3. More Exciting Than Waiting Around

Waiting around can be tedious. Dragging the conversation without meeting each other can be boring. If neither the guy nor the girl is taking any action, it can make things very emotionally draining.

Just making a plan and meeting someone will also help both of them to save each other’s time and know if they are suitable for each other or not.

It’s always considered a better idea to make a move first and to know each other better as physical meetups, especially dates, can help a person understand a lot about someone else.

4. Not Letting The Opportunity Go

If a girl plans the date first, then it lets her avoid missing the opportunity to connect with the guy. Opportunities not taken can be a person’s biggest regret.

Thus take action and meet him. Maybe you will find true love.

Making the most of the opportunity to find a perfect person and not letting that chance go will show how much you both want a connection with them and the value they hold in each other’s life.

5. Helps Boost The Girl’s Confidence

Planning a date, ensuring it goes well, and seeing your partner enjoy what you’ve prepared will give you a huge confidence boost.

It will help you be more assertive in the relationship going forward and even help you outside dating- for example, trusting yourself more with responsibility.

Planning dates means having the position and the methods to make your partner happy. It helps in the upliftment of your image as well as a solidification of the respect that he has for you.

6. Setting A Great Example As A Girl

Don’t miss the chance to set an example for other girls still stuck in the dilemma of whether making the first move is alright.

It sets a precedent for other girls around you thinking that only a guy has to do that or they are only the decision-makers for planning something special and taking the responsibility of turning it into a great one.

It might help with a more stable power balance in the relationship going forward. It shows that the girl can make things happen and chase happiness.

7. Some Guys Are Too Shy To Make The Move First

Many men are shy and introverted, which may be why they cannot make the first move and initiate a plan to meet.

When girls make the first move, the pressure to make something happen lessens and will make things much easier.

So it’s always a good idea if the girl asks the guy out for a date when things are too slow in your relationship, as their shy nature or fear of rejection can be the culprit.

Some Guys Are Too Shy To Make The Move First

8. You Both Don’t Have To Constantly Wonder

Wondering constantly and staying confused about whether the partnership/ relationship is worth it can cause a lot of stress to both the guy and the girl.

If no one is making a move and asking each other out, a lot of time would be wasted, making you anxious and stressed. Both parties want to know if their investment is symmetrical.

Asking the guy first and making a plan to meet for a date will help you overcome this conflict and make the flow of the relationship much clearer and more stable.

9. Guys Will Appreciate The Girl’s Confidence

A girl planning a date first can make the guy find her even more attractive than he already does. A study conducted in 2005 showed that 72% of men said they preferred that women make the first move.

A survey conducted in 2017 by the dating app similarly found that 95 percent of men wanted women to initiate the first kiss, and just as many wanted women to ask for their numbers.

As per the statistics, it is clear that guys love it when a girl makes the first move and is ready to take things forward without putting all the pressure on themselves.

10. You Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Planning the date first and taking a step ahead as a girl is also a sign of a girl coming out of her comfort zone. Due to the stereotype, girls aren’t often pushed to put themselves on the spot.

They don’t tend to go out of their comfort zone and take a step forward. Planning a date first as a girl gives you a chance for personal growth through vulnerability.

You may even enjoy the adrenaline rush of widening your horizons!

11. If You Will Not, Another Girl Can

This may sound a little harsh- but if you’re hesitating to plan the first date, some other girl might take the opening while your relationship is developing and very ambiguous.

It’s not about pitting women against each other, but this might happen if you show no interest in taking things forward with the one you like.

It makes sense that he would accept someone else’s advances if he feels your relationship stagnating.

12. You Have Nothing To Lose

You’ve nothing to lose if you ask and plan a date first. The worst thing that could happen is the guy saying no or rejecting your date idea. It’s not a big deal, I promise.

It would be much easier for you to revise your date idea to something more mutually comfortable or move on from the ones which do not value your time and efforts.

What Guys Think If The Girl Doesn’t Plan Dates?

A girl not scheduling dates can probably lead to the guy thinking and believing that she is not interested in him and doesn’t care enough about him and the relationship. Planning out dates for the guy is a very romantic way of expressing love towards the guy, and if you never do it, it can make your man lose interest in you and think that you’re distant and avoidant of him.

Here’s a view of what exactly goes on in a guy’s head when the girl never steps up and plans a date:

1. Feeling That The Girl Is Not Affectionate

A girl who doesn’t make plans and never takes a step forward in planning dates can become a massive turnoff for the guy.

The guy may feel unloved and undervalued due to the lack of affection given by the girl. This is not a good sign for your relationship and can lead to many stressful situations for you both!

Feeling That The Girl Is Not Affectionate

2. Guy Loses Interest In Her

Not planning anything out can obviously lead to the guy losing interest in you because there is a scarcity of effort and lack of love shown towards him.

Taking action and making plans about dates is a way of showing that you love another person. Still, if the girl isn’t doing it, it can become a very problematic and severe situation in your relationship.

3. She Is Distant And Avoids Physical Contact

A girl not making an effort to meet can make the guy think that she doesn’t want any physical contact with him and that she is distant and avoidant of him.

Meeting and having dates is a way of having physical contact and becoming much closer to each other and works as a strong foundation for building a healthy relationship.

4. The Relationship Is Not Serious For Her

The seriousness of a relationship can be judged by both the partners being devoted to each other and by sharing a solid connection with honest feelings for one another.

Suppose the guy is the only person in a relationship putting in the hard work, and the girl never takes the burden of doing the same.

In that case, the guy could undoubtedly interpret that as the girl not taking the relationship seriously.

He may feel that this won’t last in the long run because of the lack of effort or that you always intended it to be a fling with no real feelings or care involved.

5. She Does Not Want To Spend Time Together

By planning dates and meetups, people get to spend some quality time together.

By showing no enthusiasm for date-planning, the girl reveals that she doesn’t want him around and doesn’t want to spend time together and have a pleasant conversation with him.

Spending physical time together on dates can turn into romantic conversations and moments. If this comes off as one-sided, it could have a sour impact on your relationship.

6. There Is A Disconnect In The Relationship

If the same pattern continues of the guy making and planning things out and the girl never makes an effort to do the same, the guy could certainly think that there is not enough compatibility and connection between you both as the number of efforts are not identical and or even near to equal.

It is crucial for you as a girl to take on the responsibility of making plans and taking actions to make it a loving relationship with both parties contributing the same.

7. Has A Traditional Mindset

Many guys prefer non-traditional women to be a good partner to him and keep up with the times. The classic ‘Guy plans it according to his girlfriend’s likes and pays for everything’ date is, well, outdated.

Expecting this can be met with the guy feeling you will not be compatible for a deeper relationship as your mindsets may clash.

You should plan dates to show that you don’t believe in orthodox ideas that stringently govern romantic relationships.

Has A Traditional Mindset


A girl planning out dates from the first date onwards is a bold and confident step that she could make. It puts her out of her comfort zone where she has to take the initiative.

It also helps break the norm based on the perceived passivity of women. When a girl schedules a date from the initial one, it can also increase the respect a guy holds for her.

It makes you look more attractive and affectionate than someone who’s always hanging around the guy to put in some effort and take the step first.

Shashank Verma

A trained theatre actor and a STEM graduate who brings perspectives and methods from these worlds into dating and relationships. Also a big time Krav Maga enthusiast and practitioner.

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