Good breakups do exist, whether you believe it or not. Being dignified in the way you bid goodbye is how you can end up having a good breakup. But what does actually a good breakup mean?
A good breakup means parting ways with your partner respectfully and without any hard feelings. It may not always occur mutually, but at least both sides display dignified behavior. Clear communication, compassion, and no unnecessary drama are the key signs of a good breakup.
Knowing how to end a relationship is one thing. But learning why and how to end it without all the mess is a whole new dimension that gives you a smoother breakup experience. This article explores the same.
Importance Of A Good Breakup
A good breakup is important because it helps sustain mental peace, thus giving you more space to heal. Breaking up can be a tough task but nobody has ever regretted having a good breakup. Being polite and respectful can help you cut down on negative experiences.
In a good breakup, things end without unnecessary drama, saving you a lot of time and energy.
Still thinking about why a good breakup is so important? Let’s dive into the finer details of why having a good breakup is crucial.
1. Saves You From Breakup Guilt
Breakups can be really messy. A rough breakup can fill your heart with guilt, especially when you are the one who’s ending things.
It is very hard to move past this uncomfortable feeling of being the culprit, making moving on with a clear conscience even more difficult.
Even if it is a one-sided decision, doing it in a dignified and polite manner can be of much help.
Being transparent, kind, and understanding can surely save you from the breakup guilt.
You’ll at least know you did the right thing and did the best you could.
2. Makes The Breakup Less Painful
Breaking up can weigh on your mind for a long time and can even leave permanent scars.
Angry and hostile breakups can be exhausting, making it even harder to handle the aftermath and emotional complications that surface when we are in a vulnerable state.
Although the pain is inevitable, a good breakup can help you express your feelings clearly, setting you free of the negative emotions you might be holding on to.
Having enough time to process the pain can do wonders when it comes to healing.
3. Post-Breakup Energy For Self-Growth
When a relationship dies, it is hurtful and leaves a void in your life.
In case of a good breakup, you do not have to deal with unnecessary drama, which saves you a lot of time and energy.
Instead of holding on to any negative thoughts, you can invest this energy to rebuild your personality and rediscover yourself much more efficiently.
A good breakup can take your self-growth game to another level altogether.
4. You Don’t Lose Mutual Friends
When you are in a relationship, you not only share emotions but might also end up sharing a few common friends.
If the breakup is nasty, it becomes awkward even to stay in the same room, let alone hang out with these people.
Whenever you’d see your ex at the movies or at a bar with people you are also friends with, you might feel like disappearing somewhere, which is very inconvenient.
Not only is it the awkwardness that bugs you, but seeing the faces of common friends can bring back strong memories of your ex even if you meet these people without your ex around.
A good breakup doesn’t mean you have to be in constant contact or be great friends with either your ex or these mutual acquaintances.
The next time you cross your ex, instead of being awkward, just say something simple like ‘hello’ with a smile and be on your way.
Seeing you and your ex at ease with each other, you’ll not put your mutual friends in a position where they’d have to choose a side.
5. An Opportunity To Be The Better Person
A good breakup allows you to learn to respect other people’s feelings even when you just want to burst out.
It’s not always easy, but we end up building skills related to displaying patience, kindness, and consideration of someone else’s feelings during difficult conversations.
We learn to care about other people and experience being cared about. Ask yourself what you want to be remembered as?
A person throwing tantrums and behaving like a child or someone who’s always been a nice person, even during bad times?
6. Makes Sure You Don’t Get Hurt Physically
Your ex might not be a sane person and might not be in good control of their actions.
All the shouting, cursing, and sarcastic comments can trigger such a person. The best way to ensure your safety is to remain calm.
A breakup can turn really ugly in no time, and your ex might end up hurting you physically.
Getting out of a relationship without fights can keep the situation under control.
Try to be as calm as possible and if you don’t feel safe, avoid meeting your ex altogether.
If you are the one who’s being dumped and insanely furious, then too, avoid meeting your ex.
Setup a meeting only when you’re sure that life without your ex would be okay and a breakup is not as big a deal as you’re making it out to be.
How To Break Up On Good Terms?
To break up on good terms, treat your partner the way you’d want to be treated, i.e., with respect and compassion. What determines if the breakup is good or not is how you process your emotions. Be honest, kind, and respectful, and you might end up on good terms.
There is no such thing as ‘the perfect breakup’. But with the help of these tips, you can make it as good as possible, not just for you, but also for your partner.
1. Do Not Play Blame Games
Even if you have decided to part ways, do not start blaming your partner for past mistakes. This will only worsen the breakup.
So, it is better to take responsibility for your feelings and actions. Be open to accepting that the breakup is due to mutual failure.
Blaming your partner can make them defensive and turn the conversation into an argument.
Doing so will only make you lose respect for each other, thus giving you a bitter experience.
It is always easy to blame others, but sometimes we need to look within ourselves.
2. Let Your Ex Talk Their Heart Out
A breakup can be really hard to handle, so there are high chances that your partner may react unpredictably.
Even though you may not like what you hear, let them explain their take on the situation.
Not listening to your partner can heat up the conversation, leave them feeling unheard, and you two can end up fighting bitterly.
Just because you are breaking up doesn’t mean you can’t be empathetic and share a moment of sadness.
3. Give Your Ex Their Closure
To end a relationship on good terms, both partners should have a proper understanding of what actually went wrong.
Cooking up stories or not giving a clear reason often leads to speculations that can worsen the situation.
Respect the time you have spent together and do their mental health a favor by telling them exactly why you want to leave.
This would ensure there is no room left for doubts and unresolved emotions. It’ll make it easier for them to move on.
4. Use Strong Arguments But Soft Words
Crude people do things the other way round, i.e., use soft arguments but strong words.
You should always be soft with your words while telling the reason for the breakup. Remember, this might be the last time you’re talking to your ex.
Make sure to use nicer ways to express your feelings. No matter how badly you want to leave, try to be polite about it.
It’s not easy for the person being dumped either.
Harsh words and over-the-top accusations can put someone in a state of continual self-doubt and scar them forever.
The two of you have shared some good times. Respect those moments and each other.
5. Do It In A Public Place But Not In Public View
There is a huge difference between the two.
Since people behave unpredictably during breakups, ensure your safety by meeting in a public place such as a restaurant or a park with a decent crowd around.
You can even do it in the comfort of a car with doors and windows open.
It provides enough privacy while allowing an option to walk away or scream if needed. Avoid isolated parking spots, though.
Doing it in public view means washing your dirty laundry in public where you or your ex might behave like an idiot and attract attention.
A public place would make it easier for both to express yourselves freely without fear.
Doing it over call or text can create miscommunication which can change the direction of your breakup from good to bad.
If you are far away, writing a heartfelt letter can be more intimate, but you can also do it over a video call.
Breakups might be one of the hardest things you will feel, but they don’t always have to end badly.
You can bid goodbye to your partner without any hard feelings and unresolved emotions just by being compassionate and respectful.
It might sound a bit complicated, but it will save you a lot of time and energy by cutting off the main ingredient of a messy breakup, i.e., unnecessary drama.
Just go through the tips mentioned above, and you might just end up making things admirably smooth.